November 4, 2001

I had been living in the country for about 25 years, so when I finally moved back to Toronto I rejoined this congregation because I really needed to be here. So I started out with Map Makers and then last month I went to the "Exploring Our Faith' discussion.

Donna's plan was that we each had to decide what facet of Unitarianism we connect with. Be it Humanism, Naturalism, Mysticism or Theism. Some people had a problem with this but I didn't then.

I had always thought of myself as a humanist, so I joined that group. I come from a fairly conventional, middle-class Protestant family but my parents were intrinsically good people in a quiet way and I think we got their message. One example, my brother at age 61 has been donating blood every 3 months for over 30 years - every since my mother first needed a transfusion. It was only a few months ago that my sister learned this because I just happened to mention it. Somehow I had always thought that it was not important to be too concerned with a personal God but rather to just live a good life and my mothers old knitting box that I kept until it fell apart had a scroll on it, that stated "a life spent worthily is measured in deeds not years" and I always thought that sort of summed it up.

But when the Naturalists told their stories, I started to think that maybe I should be in that group. But my experience with nature was not with stars or mountains or seas. It was about the structure of the human body. When I was at university, we studied Anatomy with actual cadavers and I found it so fascinating. I loved how beautifully everything worked - muscles, bones, brain, and not least, reproduction. It seemed too perfect to just happen by chance. But then, after listening as one Naturalist describe his sense of wonder during a walk in the woods, one of the Mystic people said, "That, to me, would be a mystical experience and I thought "Hmm"!

I thought how important it was to go one step further - to consider other dimensions. The great thing about being a retired person is that there is time to do some serious reading and I have become really interested in studying universal myths and legends. So I stuck the Mysticism label on my name tag. A fellow map maker said to me last Sunday. "Aren't you brave to wear that label. I still have not decided" and judging from the email on the list there are a lot of people who are also ambivalent. And I still am too. I may change my label again, but I will never change my curiosity about the human experience.

And Donna, I will be there next Wednesday evening to talk about that most dreaded experience, the one feared almost as much as public speaking.

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